Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Midwest Redneck Umbrella Stand
Last year I bought a new red market umbrella! Fantastic! Pretty! Cute! Well... It broke! A HUGE gust of wind sent it SAILING across our yard a straight into our mini van! Scratched and dented the crap out of the van! The umbrella was in so many pieces, we still have have not found all the parts. DESTROYED! So we headed of to Walmart. I found a $25 8ft beach umbrella! Cute! I needed a umbrella stand, but the cheapest I could find was $40. No. We got home, and I found a empty paint can,and a burlap sack. Iput the can in the sack, filled it with dirt from the garden, and bingo bango! $1.19 Umbrella stand! Woot woot! That's what I'm talkin' 'bout! In your face Walmart!
Waiting to be a Mama
So I got it in my head one day that we needed a goat! Now. Today.And not just a goat, a pregnant goat! Due ANY day! Sounds like a great idea, right? No, its not. It almost caused a divorce. I found a cute little girl online, called my husband Jeremy and told him to get home ASAP. We own a older mini van, the "mini-up". We do not have a pick-up and we use the van to haul everything. I had my oldest boy,Sam 13, pull out the back seats. I ran to the barn to find a tarp and laid it out in the back of the van. Off we went.
The first thing that caused a little frustration and teasing from my husband was.. OK don't think I am a wienie... I had wrote down that we had to turn on"Idiot St". Yup, you read that right. Idiot St. Mr. goat man didn't have a good connection and that's what I heard. After a lot of teasing from Jeremy we discovered we were looking for 88th st.Of course! simple mistake. Then we had trouble finding the house. After a lot of turning around we discovered we were looking for a elementary school. That makes sense. Goat, school, I get it. The nice farmer had converted a school building into a home and farm for his family. Next, in my excitement I just grabbed my flip flops. I am no city slicker. But that's not the footwear you want to wear when you are going to get a goat! And the best part was it had just stoped raining! Yay! Lets just say poop + water = slippery poopy feet! But we fell in love with our Nubian pregnant lady! So that's what we named her, Lady.So we loaded her in the back of the mini-up and off we went.Then the fun began!
We had no pen, shelter or food! Nothing! When we got home Jeremy tied her to a tree in our back yard(she fertilized it VERY well) and got to work on a temporary pen. Yay! We did it! No,no,no,we did not do it! Our very large,pregnant goat did NOT like her new home! And by not like, I mean I got horns in the butt.She was ramming and climbing over the fence! Yikes! Jeremy, was yelling at Me to keep her in,while he got something stronger to keep her in. Well.... I am no light weight for my height, 5'3" and 125 lbs. I am not chunky, but no dainty girl. I always say I am sturdy. Well not sturdy enough to keep a mad as heck, pregnant goat in a pen! No! So whats a Mama to do with a frustrated husband talking loudly at you, a mad pregnant goat trying to butt you and run you over? That's right... CRY! In the end she was in the barn, Jeremy and I kissed and made up. All was well.
Our Lady
The first thing that caused a little frustration and teasing from my husband was.. OK don't think I am a wienie... I had wrote down that we had to turn on"Idiot St". Yup, you read that right. Idiot St. Mr. goat man didn't have a good connection and that's what I heard. After a lot of teasing from Jeremy we discovered we were looking for 88th st.Of course! simple mistake. Then we had trouble finding the house. After a lot of turning around we discovered we were looking for a elementary school. That makes sense. Goat, school, I get it. The nice farmer had converted a school building into a home and farm for his family. Next, in my excitement I just grabbed my flip flops. I am no city slicker. But that's not the footwear you want to wear when you are going to get a goat! And the best part was it had just stoped raining! Yay! Lets just say poop + water = slippery poopy feet! But we fell in love with our Nubian pregnant lady! So that's what we named her, Lady.So we loaded her in the back of the mini-up and off we went.Then the fun began!
We had no pen, shelter or food! Nothing! When we got home Jeremy tied her to a tree in our back yard(she fertilized it VERY well) and got to work on a temporary pen. Yay! We did it! No,no,no,we did not do it! Our very large,pregnant goat did NOT like her new home! And by not like, I mean I got horns in the butt.She was ramming and climbing over the fence! Yikes! Jeremy, was yelling at Me to keep her in,while he got something stronger to keep her in. Well.... I am no light weight for my height, 5'3" and 125 lbs. I am not chunky, but no dainty girl. I always say I am sturdy. Well not sturdy enough to keep a mad as heck, pregnant goat in a pen! No! So whats a Mama to do with a frustrated husband talking loudly at you, a mad pregnant goat trying to butt you and run you over? That's right... CRY! In the end she was in the barn, Jeremy and I kissed and made up. All was well.
Jeremy's barn
The mini-up!
Pretty spring sky
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